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6 Years

6 Years

  August 8th. A day that will always be a black cloud for us. A day unlike any other. The day we had to kiss our son goodbye forever.   Our hardest day had continued on from the previous few difficult days. Madox was struggling. Madox was dying. The reality...

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Radiation

Radiation

  If you didn't know, May is Brain Tumour Awareness Month. Honestly, I never knew this before Madox's diagnosis. I was blissfully ignorant about some important causes, until one was slapping me in the face. In the past few years, I've tried to bring awareness to...

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Anxiety with the unknown

Anxiety with the unknown

  Life changes after watching your child die. Things are more important. Things are less important. We see things differently. Some better, some worse. But we change. Sometimes we become hyper vigilant about things we normally would brush off or deal with in a...

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Another birthday of wondering

Another birthday of wondering

  Happy birthday my sweet boy. I can’t believe you would be 15 years old today. Such a fun time you would have had, to be 15. You would be getting closer to signing up for driving lessons. More independent with your every day decisions. More time with your...

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Birthday Card Avalanche

Birthday Card Avalanche

  Celebrating birthdays are hard after someone you love has died. I didn’t want to celebrate my birthday at all 3 months after Madox’s left. I knew how shattered I felt. How angry and alone I was, knowing how broken the world is to take a child at such a young...

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New Year, Same Me

New Year, Same Me

Sorry for going MIA for a while. I was trying to stay distracted by not thinking about my grief. It seems to work. Everyone always says “the holidays must be so hard.” Sure it is. But the every day is so much harder. The reality of it all is always crashing into me,...

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Change of School

Change of School

First day of school came upon us quickly. Maybe I ignored the hints and displays, inverting myself to protect my heart. No school supply shopping. No new clothing requests. We were in our own world, happy for the summer. First day of school still came and reared its...

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5 Years

5 Years

I have seen over the years, posts of parents sharing how long they are without their child, in years, months, days and even hours. What I thought would be interesting, just overwhelmed and saddened me more. 5 years 60 months 261 weeks 1825 days 43800 hours Oh my gawd...

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Coincidence

Coincidence

Today Marco and I went to the Valour FC soccer match. Valin was sitting with his soccer team as they all got a free ticket for winning the provincials the other day, so his aisle seat next to us sat empty. As we were watching the game, in the row in front of us, a man...

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Robbed Experience

Robbed Experience

End of school is tough on me. The relaxed nature of the kids having fun with their classmates. The feel of summer with kids biking to school, wearing shorts and staying up later than they should. Madox always loved the last few weeks of school, but in elementary, they...

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Madox’s Warriors Inc. is a Non-Profit Charitable Foundation
created in honour of Madox Suzio

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