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Another birthday of wondering


Happy birthday my sweet boy. I can’t believe you would be 15 years old today. Such a fun time you would have had, to be 15. You would be getting closer to signing up for driving lessons. More independent with your every day decisions. More time with your friends versus hanging out with your parents. You would be so different from when you were 9; from style, to hair, to mannerisms. Sadly we are now without the privilege of seeing that change, the growth in you. We will always wonder who you would have been today. How tall you would be. What would make you laugh, what would make you mad. If you would still be that snuggly kid we only knew, or embarrassed to give us a hug in front of your friends. Instead we dwell on the past, the only life we have with you. We hold on to those memories as tightly as we can, for we cannot make new ones to cherish. It’s not right. It’s not fair. We deserve to celebrate every milestone, every birthday, every argument, every joke, every grade, every EVERYTHING with you, for you. This will be your 6th birthday we couldn’t celebrate with you. Our lives will never be there same.

I hope you know how much you are missed. How much we yearn for your breath next to us. How we wish we could hear your voice call out to us, just one more time. We love you so very much Madox. Our tears still flow for you on your birth day.  Happy birthday my sweet boy.


2013 birthday

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